First of all I just want to say that sometimes things just fall into place when you least expect it. Im not saying that everything always works out or that its easy (trust me shit aint perfect) but I'm saying that sometimes it takes a tragedy to find something amazing.
For the past few weeks I cancelled all of my modeling shoots, moved into a new place, and have been struggling to find my place in this big old world.
So what have I been doing? That's the real question right?
To be honest the first couple of weeks I sat on my ass watching netflix for hours on end probably wearing the same Miley Cyrus pajama shirt (Yes I like Miley Cyrus) and not showering because I felt lost. Lost in what you ask?
I have been lost in myself, trying to figure out what I should do next or what my future plan is going to be.
The hard thing about being 21 is you don't know a damn thing. We often think that we do because we are now of legal drinking age and are able to make "Wise" decisions about our futures (HA!) but in reality we are still fucking children and have no idea whats happening.
You know unless your a childhood millionaire in which case none of this applies to you.
And then it hit me. I had recently come home (to my new home) after going on a mini vacation and thought about my trip and how much I drank (feeling shitty about it) and wondering what I was really doing with life.
Okay yeah I model and go to school and have shit going for me blah blah blah... but do I really know who I am?
So you know that one time I mentioned how everything sort of falls into place, well as I decided that I wanted to get off this same run around train of drinking, hanging out with friends, and not really dealing with my problems a magical book appeared! (Just kidding) I bought it a few months ago because the color attracted my attention and it's a #1 New York Times Bestseller. But, I decided to give it ago.
The book is called "The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin
Normally, I think that trying to make yourself happy is the most selfish thing a person can do, but this book has surprisingly given me a new perspective on the whole happiness thing.
I believe that in order to change the world and help people you have to love yourself completely and to not find happiness but to start a happiness project in order to find out who you are and (for me) be able to share that "happiness" with others.
SO I CHALLENGE YOU!
I challenge you to your own happiness project. Whatever that may be. Go out and read a damn book in the park, stop drinking, workout, eat better, talk to your elders, spend time with family, go to the beach, spend time alone, and just love your damn self.
So enough of me rambling.. I would love to hear your story either through my website or email : firstname.lastname@example.org
P.S I decided to give this blog thing a try (WARNING: I love to use explicit language because I really don't give a fuck)